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George W. Bush
 
"One of the most meaningful things that's happened to me since I've been the governor - the president - governor - president. Oops. Ex-governor. I went to Bethesda Naval Hospital to give a fellow a Purple Heart, and at the same moment I watched him - get a Purple Heart for action in Iraq - and at that same - right after I gave him the Purple Heart, he was sworn in as a citizen of the United States - a Mexican citizen, now a United States citizen." - Washington, D.C., Jan. 9, 2004
 
 

Random Quote
 
"A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who never owned a car."
— Carrie Snow
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#41 Shrimp can only swim backward.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, She sets off car alarms when she runs!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: Where does an Irish family go on vacation?
A: A different bar.
 
 



34,468 articles November 7, 2009 558,317 postings




As of Today
sorted by Date

Mexican Oysters
A big Texan stopped at a local restaurant following ...
Format: Unknown
Published : 09.28.2009

Rate: 4.00
Mental Hospital Phone Menu
Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. ...
Format: Unknown
Published : 09.03.2008

Rate: 3.83
Welfare
A Guy walked into the local welfare office to pick ...
Format: Unknown
Published : 05.18.2008

Rate: 3.73
Assorted One Liners
Q. What's the Cuban National Anthem?
Format: Unknown
Published : 05.12.2008

Rate: 3.73
Hate Your Job?
When you have a 'I Hate My Job' day, [even if retired ...
Published : 01.08.2008

Rate: 3.83
Women Are Evil By Nature
A woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately. She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers ...
Published : 12.14.2006

Rate: 4.09
Little Old Ladies
Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having ...
Published : 06.17.2006

Rate: 4.08
Sex All Afternoon - But No Head
Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days ...
Published : 05.20.2006

Rate: 4.19
Little Billy On Getting Older
Little Billy was sitting on a park bench munching ...
Published : 03.24.2005

Rate: 4.15
Are My Testicles Black?
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital with ...
Published : 02.18.2005

Rate: 4.10
Mental Case
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. ...
Published : 12.12.2004

Rate: 4.00
A Real Regular Guy
A 70 year old man complains to his doctor that at ...
Published : 06.22.2004

Rate: 3.73
Unique Breakfast
A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant ...
Published : 04.24.2004

Rate: 3.75
Bedroom Football
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when ...
Published : 04.21.2004

Rate: 4.00
My New Radio
I am so happy with my new Dolby surround sound system ...
Published : 03.27.2004

Rate: 4.20
Dragging Their Feet
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. ...
Published : 01.30.2004

Rate: 3.86
Gorilla In Heat
A certain zoo had acquired a very rare species of ...
Published : 01.23.2004

Rate: 3.50
Breast Milk
A not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his ...
Published : 01.15.2004

Rate: 2.50
Check-Up
A 75 year old woman went to the doctor for a check-up ...
Published : 10.10.2003

Rate: 3.60
Short Obituary
A woman goes into the local newspaper office to see...
Published : 09.28.2003

Rate: 3.60
Pilot Conversation
Four pilots were flying a long flight and the conversation...
Published : 08.12.2003

Rate: 3.73
Dear John
A Marine recently received a 'Dear John' letter...
Published : 08.01.2003

Rate: 3.94
How Do You Sleep?
A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in hospital...
Published : 06.16.2003

Rate: 3.33
Drive Thru Breakfast?
A guy comes into a coffee shop and places his order...
Published : 05.26.2003

Rate: 3.00
Out Of The Mouths Of Babes
Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to a baby delivery call...
Published : 05.15.2003

Rate: 3.50
Bus Driver
A little kid walks into a city bus and sits...
Published : 03.15.2003

Rate: 3.73
Is That You Jimmy?
A very large, old, building was being torn down in...
Published : 03.08.2003

Rate: 3.25
Big K Employee
Kevin, a 19 year old college student, is home for...
Published : 03.01.2003

Rate: 3.64
A Heady Task
A man decides to take some of his savings and buy...
Published : 02.18.2003

Rate: 3.00
A Penguin In Arizona
A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when...
Published : 01.29.2003

Rate: 3.67

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President Obama?
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Goofball Facts
 
The country of India produces more movies than any other country.
 
 

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01.22.2009