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George W. Bush
 
"I was proud the other day when both Republicans and Democrats stood with me in the Rose Garden to announce their support for a clear statement of purpose, "You disarm, or we will.'" —Bush, speaking about Saddam Hussein Source: FDCH Political Transcripts, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks at a Sununu for Senate Fundraiser," Oct. 5, 2002
 
 

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"Last year for Christmas, I got a humidifier and a dehumidifier... I thoughtI'd put them in the same room and let them duke it out."
— Steven Wright, Comedian
 
 

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#198 The US is the largest country names after an actual person (Amerigo Vespucci).
 
 

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so stupid she couldn't read an audio book.
 
 

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Lawyer Makes a Friend

By: JskillsPublished: 12/09/1998
 
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A well dressed lawyer went into a bar for a martini and found himself beside a scrungy-looking drunk who kept mumbling and studying something in his hand. The attorney leaned closer while the drunk held the tiny object up to the light,slurring
"Well, it looks like plastic."

Then he rolled it between his fingers,adding,
"But it feels like rubber."

Curious, the lawyer asked,
"What do you have there mister?"

The drunk stammered,
"Damn if I know, but it looks like plastic and feels like rubber."

The lawyer said,
"Let me take a look."

And the drunk handed it over. The attorney rolled it between his thumb and fingers, then examined it closely.

"Yeah, it does look like plastic and feel like rubber, but I don't know what it is. Where did you get it anyway?"

The drunk replied, "Outa my nose.

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    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    dsrfghds (0 replies)  
    started by djdawg169
    (03.16.2001 6:41:04 PM EST)

    This sucks ass hole

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