Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
BakerMedia
Busted Tees
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

S
upport Goofball.com

George W. Bush
 
"We hold dear what our Declaration of Independence says, that all have got uninalienable rights, endowed by a Creator."Source: The New York Times, "Reporter's Notebook; Skipping Borders, Tripping Diction," David E. Sanger, May 28, 2002
 
 

Random Quote
 
"I do not take drugs - I am drugs."
— Salvador Dali
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#162 The temperature of the sun can reach up to 15 million degrees fahrenheit.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: How do you turn a city girl into a cotton picker?
A: Cut her tampon string.
 
 


Desperately Seeking Technical Support

By: SasksquatchPublished: 02/10/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

Desperately seeking technical support! I'm currently running the latest version of Girlfriend 5.0 and having some problems. I've been running the same version of Drinking Buddies 1.0 for years as my primary application, and all the Girlfriend releases have always conflicted with it.

I hear that Drinking Buddies won't crash if you minimize Girlfriend with the sound off, but since I can't find the switch to turn it off, I just run them separately and it works OK. Girlfriend also seems to have a problem coexisting with Golfware, often trying to abort my Golf program with some sort of timing incompatibility.

I probably should have stayed with Girlfriend 1.0, but I thought I might see better performance with Girlfriend 2.0. After months of conflicts, I consulted a friend who has experience with Girlfriend 2.0. He said I probably didn't have enough cache to run Girlfriend 2.0 and eventually it would require a Token Ring upgrade to run properly. He was right.

As soon as I purged my cache, Girlfriend 2.0 uninstalled itself. Shortly after that, I installed a Girlfriend 3.0 beta. All the bugs were supposed to be gone, but the first time I used it, it gave me a virus.

After a hard drive clean up and thorough virus scan, I very cautiously upgraded to Girlfriend 4.0.- this time using a SCSI probe and virus protection. It worked OK for a while until I discovered Girlfriend 1.0 wasn't completely uninstalled! I tried to run Girlfriend 1.0 again with Girlfriend 4.0 still installed, but Girlfriend 4.0 has an unadvertised feature that automatically senses the presence of Girlfriend 1.0 and communicates with it in some way, resulting in the immediate removal of both versions!

The version I have now works pretty well, but, like all versions, there are still some problems. The Girlfriend package is still written in some obscure language that I can't understand, much less reprogram. And I've never liked how Girlfriend is totally object-oriented. A year ago, a friend upgraded his version to GirlfriendPlus 1.0, which is a Terminate-and-Stay-Resident version. He discovered girlfriendPlus1.0 expires within a year if you don't upgrade to Fiancee 1.0. So he did.

But soon after that, you have to upgrade to Wife 1.0, which he describes as a "huge resource hog." It has taken up all his space, so he can't load anything else. One of the primary reasons that he upgraded to Wife is that it came bundled with FreeSex 1.0. Well, it turns out that the resource allocation module of Wife 1.0 sometimes prohibits access to FreeSex (particularly the new Plug and Play items he wanted to try). On top of that, Wife 1.0 must be running on a well warmed-up system before he can do anything. And, although he did not ask for it, Wife 1.0 came with Mother-In-Law 1.0, which has an automatic pop-up feature he can't turn off.

I told him to install Mistress 1.0, but he said that he heard that if you try to run it without first uninstalling Wife, that Wife 1.0 will delete MSMoney files before uninstalling itself. Then Mistress 1.0 won't install anyway, due to insufficient resources.

Is anybody out there able to offer technical advice?

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Hello, tech support? Help me...
  • How to dump a girlfriend
  • Man Arrested For Hitting Girlfriend With A What?
  • Ugly girlfriend?
  • Hello? Tech Support?
  • Wannabe Jerky Boy Makes A Tech Support Call
  • High-Tech Panhandling
  • tech Jokes
  • Vaseline On The Chrome
  • The New Harley
  • Embarrassing Moments: 'New Woman' Magazine
  • John Davis
  • Sid Vicious
  • Christian Slater
  • Rae Carruth
  • Man Sets Record for Loudest Belch
  • Dudley Moore
  • My Dog Rules
  • Crazy ER Happenings
  • The Art of Lovemaking

  • More Technology Jokes...

     

    Search
     
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    My Advice... (0 replies)
    started by oxbrain
    (02.10.2001 5:31:59 PM EST)

    well, I've been with this all the way since Crush .08, I have since upgraded through girlfriend 1.3 After having all sorts of problems with all of these installs I decided to just switch over to Hand 2.0 it comes with the hardware. It's more powerful, and best of all, unless of a severe hardware crash it won't even be deleted.

    "It ain't imoral if it's only oral"

    Tech Help (0 replies)
    started by JethroSkywalker
    (12.26.2000 4:28:48 PM EST)

    My advice is to dump Girlfriend 1.0-1.4. Stay away from Girlfriendplus programs. All uses of this item result in failure. You can buy Wife 1.0 Patch#3-TD (Also called Divorcee 1.0) from Microsoft to fix the bugs Wife 1.0 brings. However, a permanent bug that stays with your system is that deduction of sums of money from your bookkeeping files. Divorcee 1.0 also wards off future versions of GirlfriendPlus, which would eventually end in the same such instance.
    Girlfriend-S[lut] 1.0 comes with the FreeSex 1.0 software but only services as long as you purchase select items from the internet. However, remember to run a virus scan over Girlfriend-S 1.0 before use.

    "Honey, I didn't mean it like that!"

    he he he (0 replies)
    started by chykn
    (08.03.2000 11:20:44 AM EST)

    Too true, too true!

    Pro 1.0 (0 replies)  
    started by sammyboy
    (08.03.2000 8:31:08 AM EST)

    Apparently you can get the likes of Pro 1.0 which is a very discrete little programme to run in parrallel with FreeSex 1.0. Would advise running Pro 1.0 on a different workbench as the aforementioned automatic detection system in Girlfriend 4.0 carries over to Wife 1.0. Word of warning, use virus protection with Pro 1.0, and see your LAN allows use of Pro 1.0 as it may be an illegal operation.

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Rate This!

    3.26 Goofballs of 5
    136 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • Lookie Here!

    Goofball Facts
     
    Chickens that lay brown eggs have red ear lobes. There is a genetic link between the two.