Cards to send when the relationship goes bad:
You were meant for me, perhaps as a punishment.
When I met you, I thought about becoming a Satanist, but then I decided
that worshipping you could give you the wrong idea about our relationship.
I know how to push all my wife's buttons...now if I could only find the
one marked OFF!
I must admit, you brought religion in my life. I never believed in hell
until I met you.
Looking back over the years that we've been together, I can't help but
wonder: what the F@!% was I thinking?
As the days go by, I think of how lucky I am that you're not here to ruin
it for me.
They say that an attractive human body is worth a million dollars. Looks
like someone robbed your ugly ass.
When we were together, you always said you'd die for me. Now that we've
broke up, I think it's time you kept your promise.
I knew the day would come when you would leave me for my best friend. So
here's his leash, water bowl and chew toys.
I'm so miserable without you, it's almost like you're here.
Nice shot!
Love the country, live to pee outside!
