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George W. Bush
"We need to thin our forests in America." —Bush, on the evil of forests, Aug. 11, 2003 Source: The Arizona Republic, "In Arizona, Bush Touts His Idea to Thin Forests," Aug. 12, 2003.

Random Quote
"For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex... uh... setbacks."
—George Bush speech

Snapple Facts
#186 A female kangaroo is called a flyer.

Yo Mama ...
breath smell is so bad when she yawns her teeth duck.

One Liners
Q. What's Afghanistan's national bird?
A. Duck.

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

By: Carl FoghPublished: 08/09/2000
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1. Good: Your wife is pregnant.
Bad: It's triplets.
Ugly: You had a vasectomy five years ago.

2. Good: Your wife's not talking to you.
Bad: She wants a divorce.
Ugly: She's a lawyer.

3. Good: Your son is finally maturing.
Bad: He's involved with the woman next door.
Ugly: So are you.

4. Good: Your son studies a lot in his room.
Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there.
Ugly: You're in them.

5. Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids.
Bad: You can't find your birth control pills.
Ugly: Your daughter borrowed them.

6. Good: Your husband understands fashion.
Bad: He's a cross-dresser.
Ugly: He looks better than you.

7. Good: You give the "birds and bees" talk to your daughter.
Bad: She keeps interrupting.
Ugly: With corrections.

8. Good: The postman's early.
Bad: He's wearing fatigues and carrying a shotgun.
Ugly: You gave him nothing for Christmas.

9. Good: Your son is dating someone new.
Bad: It's another man.
Ugly: He's your best friend.

10. Good: Your daughter got a new job.
Bad: As a hooker.
Ugly: Your coworkers are her best clients.
Way ugly: She makes more money than you do.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of

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    This Section


    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    This stuff sucks... (0 replies)
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (09.01.2000 4:38:13 PM EST)

    Man Ive seen better in my own house..... Like my sister!!!!

    It's only funny if YOU make it funnier (idiots) (0 replies)
    started by NakedCanuck
    (08.09.2000 10:32:54 AM EST)

    Good: your son had his first sexual experience and didn't get her pregnant
    Bad: It was with the maid and now he has an STD.
    Ugly: Explaining to the wife why you have it too.

    The Naked Canuck Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

    This one is old (0 replies)
    started by wolfbrother11b
    (08.09.2000 10:17:21 AM EST)

    This is too fucking old this sucks. Get some new shit.

    yes I agree (0 replies)
    started by bat
    (08.09.2000 8:50:39 AM EST)

    with loser

    Love your country,Question your government.

    What the hell is this? (0 replies)
    started by loser
    (08.09.2000 0:38:42 AM EST)

    Good: Goofball gets new jokes every day
    Bad: They all suck
    Ugly: People only read them while waiting for the porn to download


    I am first! (0 replies)  
    started by aznkid5
    (08.09.2000 0:10:19 AM EST)

    I am first because I have the power to do so!!!!! is not responsible for any content which individual users post. reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.

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    Goofball Facts
    Lincoln Logs were invented by Frank Lloyd Wright's son.