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George W. Bush
"If he's - the inference is that somehow he thinks slavery is a - is a noble institution I would - I would strongly reject that assumption - that John Ashcroft is a open-minded, inclusive person."-George W. Bush, Jan. 2001

Random Quote
"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."
— Mark Twain

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#27 A ball of glass will bounce higher then a ball of rubber.

Yo Mama ...
... is so fat, She's half Indian, half Irish, and half French!

One Liners
Q. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
A. Because those men already have boyfriends.

Top Ten Rejected Valentines Day Cards

By: simonsezPublished: 02/10/2005
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10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk
But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk

9. Our love will never become cold and hollow
Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.

8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store
In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.

7. This feels so good, it feels so right
I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.

6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class
Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.

5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished
But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!

4. Through all the things that came to pass
Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.

3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie
I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".

2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny
So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!

1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister
You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of

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    This Section


    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    LMAO (0 replies)
    started by obxbeachbum
    (02.11.2005 10:32:27 PM EST)

    So has your ass.

    lmfao (0 replies)
    started by bigjohn2
    (02.10.2005 8:04:06 PM EST)

    these are great ....

    So Simon (0 replies)  
    started by thecritic
    (02.10.2005 0:30:27 AM EST)

    Will the family be receiving visitors in the home or the funeral parlor? Do we give flowers or donate to charity.
    Will they cremate You?


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    Polar bears can smell a human from 20 miles away.