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George W. Bush
"The fundamental question is, 'Will I be a successful president when it comes to foreign policy?' I will be, but until I'm the president, it's going to be hard for me to verify that I think I'll be more effective."-In Wayne, Mich., as quoted in the New York Times, June 28, 2000

Random Quote
"I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."
— New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season

Snapple Facts
#85 The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows.

Yo Mama ...
is so stupid she got hit by a parked car!

One Liners
Q: How do you know when you're REALLY ugly?
A: Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.

Top Ten Rejected Valentines Day Cards

By: simonsezPublished: 02/10/2005
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10. I admire your strength, I admire your spunk
But the thing I like best, is getting you drunk

9. Our love will never become cold and hollow
Unless, one day, you refuse to swallow.

8. I bought this Valentine's card at the store
In hopes that, later, you'd be my whore.

7. This feels so good, it feels so right
I just wish it wasn't $250 a night.

6. You're a woman of style, you're a woman of class
Especially when I'm spanking, your big-round-fat ass.

5. Before I met you, my heart was so famished
But now I'm fulfilled. . . SO MAKE ME A SAMICH!!!

4. Through all the things that came to pass
Our love has grown. . . but so's your ass.

3. You're a honey. . . and you're a cutie
I just wished you had J-Lo's "booty".

2. I don't wanna be sappy or silly or corny
So, right to the point, let's do it, I'm horny!

1. If you think that hickey looks like a blister
You should check out the one that I gave to your sister!

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of

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    This Section


    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    LMAO (0 replies)
    started by obxbeachbum
    (02.11.2005 10:32:27 PM EST)

    So has your ass.

    lmfao (0 replies)
    started by bigjohn2
    (02.10.2005 8:04:06 PM EST)

    these are great ....

    So Simon (0 replies)  
    started by thecritic
    (02.10.2005 0:30:27 AM EST)

    Will the family be receiving visitors in the home or the funeral parlor? Do we give flowers or donate to charity.
    Will they cremate You?


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    Goofball Facts
    In Middle Eastern Islamic countries, it is a crime to eat any lamb you've had sex with.