Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"The great thing about America is everybody should vote."Austin, Texas, Dec. 8, 2000
 
 

Random Quote
 
"Pitching is 80 percent of the game. The other half is hitting and fielding."
— baseball player Mickey Rivers
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#78 Alaska is the most eastern and western state in the US.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so fat that she would have been in E.T., but when she rode the bike across the moon, the bitch caused an eclipse.
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. What kind of coffee was served on the titanic?
A. Sanka.
 
 


Nerd Sayings

By: BillGatesPublished: 12/02/1998
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

2. COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key.

3. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.

4. 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

5. Computers make very fast, very accurate
mistakes.

6. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

7. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

8. C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL

9. C:DOS C:DOSRUN RUNDOSRUN

10. <--- The information went data way --->

11. Best file compression around: 'DEL *.*' = 100% compression.

12. The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.

13. BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding.

14. The name is Baud, James Baud.

15. BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!

16. Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!

17. C:> Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner!

18. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay!
Staaay..

19. Why doesn't DOS ever say 'EXCELLENT command or
filename!'

20. As a computer, I find your faith in technology
amusing.

21. Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

22. Backups? We don' NEED no steenking backups.

23. E Pluribus Modem

24. >... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

25. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the
Etherbunny.

26. A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral
available.

27. An error? Impossible! My modem is error
correcting.

28. CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington
D.C. (Y/N)?

29. Does fuzzy logic tickle?

30. A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord.

31. 11th commandment-Thou shalt not covet thy
neighbor's Pentium.

32. 24 hours in a day...24 beers in a
case...coincidence?

33. Disinformation is not as good as
datinformation.

34. Windows: Just another pane in the glass.

35. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .

36. Who's General Failure & why is he reading my
disk?

37. Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.

38. RAM disk is not an installation procedure.

39. Shell to DOS...Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS...

40. All computers wait at the same speed.

41. Computer: A device designed to speed and automate errors.

42. Go ahead, make my data!

43. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.....

44. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

45. ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

46. E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient
voltage.

47. Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!!!

48. All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

49. Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to
continue.

50. '640K ought to be enough for anybody.' - Bill Gates, 1981

51. DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to
CONFIG.SYS

52. Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS

53. Press any key to continue or any other key to
quit...

54. Press any key...... no, No, NO!! Not THAT
one!

55. Press -- to continue ...

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Sayings that should be on buttons...
  • The nerd
  • Police Say Cat Killings Raise Fears for Humans
  • Man Says He Was Asleep When He Killed Wife
  • Women Say Men are like...
  • Say A Prayer
  • 58 Things NOT to say to a man in bed
  • Pamela Anderson Say It Ain't So
  • Politically correct ways to say someone is stupid
  • Confucius say...
  • Prosecutors Say Woman Faked Cancer for Cash
  • Things To Say If You Get Caught Sleeping At Your Desk
  • Things To Say If You Get Caught Sleeping At Your Desk
  • Things Women Should Never Say To A Naked Man
  • Students Say Class Too Hard, File Suit
  • Say Goodbye To Beaver U.
  • Top Ten Things Not To Say To Parents When Picking Up A Date:
  • Airline Says It Was Forced To Kill 440 Squirrels
  • Austrailian Nutritionist Says Passing Gas Good for You
  • Say a Little Prayer

  • More Top Ten Lists Jokes...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzz (0 replies)
    started by stevenjlafferty
    (01.30.2001 11:17:15 AM EST)

    Oh sorry i fell asleep with my finger on the scroll button after reading the first few lines!!!!

    I READ THE FIRST 5 or 6 (0 replies)
    started by KaptainAype
    (11.14.2000 7:20:17 PM EST)

    I READ THE FIRST FEW AND I WAS OUTRAGED!!! THIS SUCKS ASS!!! I CANT BELIEVE SOME MOFO THOUGHT OF THESE!!! THEY ARE NOT FUNNY AT ALL!!! TAKE THIS OFF THE SITE IT IS A DISGRACE!!!! HOW DO U ALLOW THIS ON YOUR SITE!?!>!?!?!?!?!??

    -=KaP'N AyPe=- You Filthy Ape Ass Bitch <^>(0żo)<^>

    lame (0 replies)
    started by kngnothen
    (10.19.2000 9:17:15 PM EST)

    this is so lame whoever typed all of this has NO LIFE

    so funny i forgot to ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzz (0 replies)  
    started by Anonymous Goofball
    (07.13.2000 1:33:15 AM EST)

    i am ashamed this is the dumbest thing i have ever seen on your site get rid of it

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    Top 10 Slogans That Belong On Colostomy Bags
    Top Ten Slogans That Belong On Colostomy Bags 10. “My other bag’s a Prada”
    04.25.2007

    You Know You Grew Up In The 80's If:
    You Know You Grew Up In the 80's if ...
    01.31.2007

    The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women
    #10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.
    10.18.2006

    Rate This!

    2.59 Goofballs of 5
    171 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Top 10 Slogans That Belong On Colostomy Bags
    Top Ten Slogans That Belong On Colostomy Bags 10. “My other bag’s a Prada”
    04.25.2007

    You Know You Grew Up In The 80's If:
    You Know You Grew Up In the 80's if ...
    01.31.2007

    The Top Ten Reasons Why Men Prefer Guns Over Women
    #10. You can trade an old 44 for a new 22.
    10.18.2006

    Two Years Ago
    Top Ten Reasons There are No Blacks in NASCAR
    # 10 - Have to sit upright while driving.
    03.23.2006

    Lookie Here!
    Mug Shots : Celebrities Under Arrest

    Goofball Facts
     
    80 percent on US sixth-graders can't locate the US on a world map.