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George W. Bush
 
"If a person doesn't have the capacity that we all want that person to have, I suspect hope is in the far distant future, if at all." -George W. Bush, May 22, 2001
 
 

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"I married the first man I ever kissed. When I tell my children that they just about throw up."
— Barbara Bush
 
 

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Man Survives Amputation and Self-Inflicted Head Wound

By: BizarreNewsPublished: 02/13/2001
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

BETHLEHEM, Pennsylvania - Those nasty work-place amputations can really hurt.

Just ask 25-year-old William Bartron. Last week

Bartron severed his hand clean off while working with

a miter saw in a friend´s basement. Apparently the

pain was so terrible that he tried to end his torment

with a pneumatic nail gun. When he was finally found

Bartron had at least a dozen 1-inch nails protruding

from his head. Miraculously he survived. He underwent

emergency surgery to reattach the hand and was last

reported in stable condition.

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You must register to participate in this discussion.
Its great (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(03.15.2001 11:33:45 AM EST)

This site is so fuuny it has to be one of the better funny sites. I like the news

where is 2 hands ??? (0 replies)
started by piggo
(02.17.2001 3:58:50 PM EST)

i would like to know where on goofball that i can find the movie 2 hands where a guy is double fisting his partner while having quite a large hardon

The question is... (0 replies)
started by DeathFaze
(02.16.2001 10:44:17 PM EST)

Why was he doing in his friend's basement?

Where was his friend?

I bet you that he was a sex slave trapped in his friend's basement trying to escape with a saw... When he couldn't do it, he tried to commit suicide with whatever is around. I guess he had enough anal penetration...

"According to a poll done by Times Magazine, 4 out of 3 people can't do ratios..." - DeathFaze

forgot my Username (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(02.14.2001 9:38:06 AM EST)

Actually it DID help with the pain. The human brain can only take so much... and 12 nails plus the severed limb caused his brain to stop recognizing pain signals.

What this article fails to mention is to mention is that the doctors left several of the nails in his head...
so they wouldn't cause him un~due pain....

lol

Stable condition???? (0 replies)
started by trc
(02.14.2001 4:52:23 AM EST)

There's nothing stable about that guy !!!!

Dumbass (0 replies)
started by kangeramber
(02.13.2001 11:26:23 PM EST)

What a total dumbass.

kangeramber

Ohh no... (0 replies)
started by Kat25
(02.13.2001 11:14:34 PM EST)

*lmao* "I wonder what'll help with the pain--I know, I'll stick a few nails in my head..yeah, that'll help!" Scary, scary, scary..don't try this at home kids.

Kat

NAILED !!! (0 replies)
started by stevesvault
(02.13.2001 5:55:23 PM EST)

aahh, only proves that people are stupid.Next time he should ask for a hand.

I only wish... (0 replies)
started by testiclees
(02.13.2001 5:46:15 PM EST)

I only wish that the damn nial gun would've killed him. We don't need people like this getting a chance to breed.

I am Testiclees: Lord of the Pants

Blah! (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(02.13.2001 2:52:12 PM EST)

Nobody pays attention to the comments in here.

This was on CNN's site (0 replies)
started by heavypumpkin
(02.13.2001 2:28:18 PM EST)

I submitted this nearly two weeks ago and you print it now and give bizarre news the credit? Give me a break. You gotta admire this guys persistance though. I wonder if the headache helped him forget about how much his arm hurt.

You can't polish a turd.

Chicken or egg? (0 replies)
started by DogBreath
(02.13.2001 12:23:02 PM EST)

Maybe his hand tried to kill him with the nail gun and he chopped it off to save his life.

If it attempts to kill him again could he sue the doctor for reattaching it?

The Dog Man has spoken. Woof.

Loss of hand and splitting headache? (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(02.13.2001 11:56:39 AM EST)

OK< They replaced the hand but, did they use a clawhammer to remove the nails for the head?

Darwin missed this one. (0 replies)
started by NakedCanuck
(02.13.2001 11:10:22 AM EST)


Someone needs to tell this guy that the spiked look is out.

The Naked CanuckEverybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

mentalcase (0 replies)
started by miracleman
(02.13.2001 10:25:37 AM EST)

SORRY , THINGS CAN NEVER BE THAT BAD !!!!!!

the future will be beter tommorrow$$$$$$$$

DUHHH! (0 replies)
started by QTKitty
(02.13.2001 9:08:56 AM EST)

Talk about your idiots!

Stay sane inside insanity!

You kow what? (0 replies)
started by thelizard
(02.13.2001 8:41:16 AM EST)

You know what ? Truth IS stranger than fiction.

Poison Clan rocks the world !!!!

DUMB ASS (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(02.13.2001 6:07:36 AM EST)

THIS HAPPENED NORTH OF BETHLEHEM IN A TOWN CALLED "LEHIGHTON" THIS THING GOES ON ALOT THERE, FREKEN MORON'S LIVE THERE, GO FIGURE!!!

Yowsa! (0 replies)
started by Anonymous Goofball
(02.13.2001 2:30:51 AM EST)

That hit the nail on the head.. Oh, wait...

Dang (0 replies)
started by barnyardstyle
(02.13.2001 1:28:30 AM EST)

That guy must have looked like Pinhead from Hellraiser after that

Nothing left to live for... (0 replies)
started by OliverClozoff
(02.13.2001 0:08:48 AM EST)


That was probably the hand he wanked off with.



President, American Association of Amateur Gynecologists

WELL THERE IS (0 replies)  
started by donut38
(02.13.2001 0:06:25 AM EST)

IS NOTHING MUCH TO SAY HERE OTHER THAN

THIS GUY SHOULD GET A LIFE


BUT THEN AGAIN I`M HERE???? GO FIGURE

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