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	George W. Bush
	"The goals for this country are peace in the world. And the goals for this country are a compassionate American for every single citizen. That compassion is found in the hearts and souls of the American citizens."Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "President Visits D.C. Food Bank," Dec. 19, 2002

	Random Quote
	"You make the beds, you do the dishes, and six months later you have to start all over again." — Joan Rivers, Comedian

	Snapple Facts
	#223 The Basenji is the only type of dog that does not bark.

	Yo Mama ...
	so ugly they used her in prisons to cure sex offenders!!

	One Liners
	Q: What do tofu and dildos have in common? A: They're both meat substitutes.

Most Recent
	Man Charged After Passing Gas Toward Cop A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer ... 09.29.2008 Cuffed, Booked For Not Paying Library Fines A Wisconsin woman has been arrested ... 09.01.2008 Woman Kills Husband With Folding Couch St Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall. 08.09.2008 Brothel Offers Customers Gas Rebate Clients of the Shady Lady Ranch will get a $50 gas voucher if they fork out $300 -- worth about one hour's worth of services -- at the brothel in Beatty, Nevada, 130 miles northwest of Las Vegas. 08.08.2008

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Section Features
	Top Ranked Items

One Year Ago
	Nude Man In High Heels Causes Lockdown McMINNVILLE, Ore. - A man wearing nothing but women's ... 06.25.2007 Mom Teed Off By Urinating Drunk Golfers OAK RIDGE, Tenn. - A mother teed off by drunken golfers ... 06.24.2007 Grandma Finds Condom In McDonald's Bag WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A grandmother was alarmed ... 06.23.2007 Man Arrested For Driving Golf Cart Drunk In the spirit of golf season ... I was actually surprised that this wasn't Roger. 06.04.2007

Two Years Ago
	Prosecutor Charged With Indecency A city prosecutor was charged ... 10.11.2006 Sex Gadget Gets Man in Trouble at Airport Cook County prosecutors say a 29-year-old man traveling with his mother desperately didn't want her to know he'd packed a sexual aid for their trip to Turkey. 09.03.2006 Woman Crashes While Teaching Dog to Drive A woman in Hohhot Beijing, the capital of north China's Inner Mongolia region, crashed her car while giving her dog a driving lesson. 09.02.2006 Teattime Love Bite Was this the only way she was able to get him to make ... 07.27.2006

Lookie Here!
	UFOs, JFK and Elvis

	Goofball Facts
	Ohio is the only state not to have a rectangular flag. It's a pennant.