Search
 


Advanced Search
 
Entire Site

Goofball Login

Cookies must be
enabled to log in

Username:

Password:

Remember Me?

»Preview
» Why Register?
»Register Now!
» Renew Now!
» Who's Online Now
» Log In Trouble?

 

Assorted Goofiness
BakerMedia
College Humor
EHOWA
Fark
JokeDump
Mike's List
Ogrish
Zfilter

George W. Bush
 
"But I also made it clear to (Vladimir Putin) that it's important to think beyond the old days of when we had the concept that if we blew each other up, the world would be safe." -George W. Bush, May 1, 2001
 
 

Random Quote
 
"There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 500SL."
— Lynn Lavner
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#6 A honey bee can fly at 15mph.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
... is so fat, All the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 240 Patrons OR Yo Mama"
 
 

One Liners
 
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.
 
 


Spitball Felon Avoids 8-Year Jail Sentence

By: RobnoxiousPublished: 06/07/2002
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

WALNUT CREEK (Reuters) - A 13-year-old California boy who was facing a possible eight years in juvenile prison for a spitball attack on a fellow student was given a much lighter sentence on Thursday -- although he will still log some time behind bars.

Jeffrey Figueroa, who made national headlines after he was convicted of two felonies for injuring a 14-year-old boy with the speedy spitball, was ordered to spend a spend a total of one week in juvenile detention -- logged on weekends -- in a case that his lawyer said showed prosecutors intent on "criminalizing childhood behavior."

"These kids aren't going to get into any trouble. We're going to keep them in the house," Jeffrey's father, Steve Figueroa, told reporters after the hearing, which also saw Jeffrey's 14-year-old brother given a slightly lesser sentence for egging Jeffrey on in the spitball incident.

In addition to their time in juvenile detention, both boys were ordered to attend anger management classes, told to obey a 7 p.m. curfew as part of home probation and instructed to undergo counseling.

They will both also be required to perform up to 150 hours of community service at a local eye bank.

Figueroa admitted that he shot the spitball -- a gum wrapper moistened with saliva -- on the first day of school last September at a middle school in the San Francisco suburb of Walnut Creek, California.

While Figueroa said he was not aiming at anybody in particular, the spitball hit a 14-year-old boy in the right eye, requiring a trip to the hospital and surgery.

Last month Contra Costa County Superior Court Judge Araceli Ramirez found Jeffrey guilty of battery causing serious bodily injury and mayhem, both felonies. His brother was found guilty on a lesser charge.

Numerous neighbors testified at Thursday's sentencing hearing, saying the boys frequently ran wild in the neighborhood and at times appeared threatening.

Ramirez, while declining to throw the book at the boys, did have sharp words for both the young men and their parents, saying they had been "in denial" about their sons' behavior.

Figueroa's lawyer, Caren Johnson, criticized Contra Costa County District Attorney Robert Burke as overreacting to the case, saying prosecutors were intent on "criminalizing childhood behavior."

"I've got little boys. They've got swords, they whack each other with swords. What if they whack a neighbor kid with a sword. Is Burke going to charge my little 5-year-old with battery?" she said.

But the principal investigator for the district attorney's office testified that both boys were frequently out of control and needed to be taught a lesson.

"Normal boy activity is responsible and does responsible things," said investigator Mark Ernst.

"Occasionally they may do something that they shouldn't do, but they generally respect authority, respect adult figures and correct their behavior."

Burke, speaking after the sentencing, said he was fairly satisfied with the sentence but that Jeffrey Figueroa's spitball victim was still being treated for damage to his eye.

"I couldn't replace that young man's eye, and that's what we'd all like to have happen. So I guess you never feel like you've done everything you could do," Burke said.

Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?

Related Links
  • Spitball Could Land Boy in Prison
  • Talent Night In Prison
  • Looking For a Few Good Men -- in Prison
  • Tax Credits Denied To 4 Prison 'Beggars'
  • Prison Inmates Save the Day for 2,000 Youngsters
  • Exorcism For Prison Inmate
  • Man Sentenced to a Year in Prison for Killing Time
  • British Lord Tea Bagging In Prison
  • Prison art
  • Prison Barbie
  • Golf prison
  • Prison Hotel?
  • Prison Playpen
  • Prison Celebration
  • The Spitball Game
  • Going to Prison?
  • Happy Birthday Prison Style
  • Prisoners Riot Over Underdone Chicken
  • Prisoner in Agony Over Jelly Filling Overdose
  • Prisoner Jumps Out of Frying Pan and Into the Fire

  • More Stupid News...

     

    Search
     


    Advanced Search
     
    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM LIST  

    You must register to participate in this discussion.
    Well now... (0 replies)
    started by roger
    (06.11.2002 7:52:07 AM EST)


    Pregnant women who marry spit ball throwers.... next up on Jerry Springer.


    Just protecting my sheep

    we used to shoot these things (0 replies)
    started by suicideking
    (06.10.2002 3:53:26 PM EST)

    we'd take metal wiring out of spiral notebooks, bend them to form staple-shaped barbs, then cut the ends into points, and launch them through a rubber-band powered gun made out of a mechanical pencil...very effective and good for breaking the skin. fuck eyes, who needs em


    §Üî©ìÐéK‡ñG
    Killers are silent

    I wear glasses these days (0 replies)
    started by harrymonkbubble
    (06.08.2002 4:57:33 PM EST)

    So I know how valuable eyesight is.

    This case being brought to court is more than likely as a result of other more serious charges failing to reach the court. A means to an end I reckon.

    Marvin and Roger Suck Goats

    You'll put your eye out. (0 replies)
    started by proverbialchump
    (06.08.2002 6:42:04 AM EST)

    Anger management? They are just kids that where playing, being kids. It was a fricking accident!

    And to think, I used to throw paper airplanes, in school. What the hell was I thinking, back then?

    Justice prevails (0 replies)  
    started by marvin
    (06.08.2002 5:45:37 AM EST)

    the outcome sounds reasonable to me (the "guilty" are not as innocent as it wouuld first have seemed) .... almost an eye for an eye though !

    Well done to the judge !

    Goofball.com is not responsible for any content which individual users post. Goofball.com reserves the right to delete any content which it deems objectionable or in violation of any law or regulation.


    Most Recent
    S.t. Patrick's Day Drug Bust
    On St. Patrick's Day, Ohio cops seized crack ...
    05.10.2008

    Man Convicted Of Sending Penis Photo By Phone
    BERLIN- A 21-year-old German man has been convicted ...
    04.18.2008

    Toe-licking Robber Gets Probation
    MINNEAPOLIS - A man who robbed a woman of her keys ...
    04.09.2008

    You Think You Got A Painful Job?
    If you think, for one second, you’ve got a bad job ...
    04.08.2008

    Rate This!

    3.63 Goofballs of 5
    8 Viewer(s) rated

    Rating the content is for registered users only.

    Section Features
  • Top Ranked Items
  • One Year Ago
    Nude Man In High Heels Causes Lockdown
    McMINNVILLE, Ore. - A man wearing nothing but women's ...
    06.25.2007

    Mom Teed Off By Urinating Drunk Golfers
    OAK RIDGE, Tenn. - A mother teed off by drunken golfers ...
    06.24.2007

    Grandma Finds Condom In McDonald's Bag
    WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A grandmother was alarmed ...
    06.23.2007

    Man Arrested For Driving Golf Cart Drunk
    In the spirit of golf season ... I was actually surprised that this wasn't Roger.
    06.04.2007

    Two Years Ago
    And Why the Hell Do They Need Uniforms?
    Dennis FitzSimons, the chief executive of the company that owns the Chicago Cubs, said today that staff reductions would be needed to bring costs in line with other properties in the Tribune Co. portfolio.
    07.19.2006

    Aussie Woman Swallows 320 Condoms Full Of Drugs
    A woman who police allege ...
    06.29.2006

    Lightning Kills Motorcyclist
    A motorcyclist died after he was struck by lightning while riding in rush hour traffic between Denver and Boulder ...
    06.22.2006

    Snake Fails To Show Up For Wedding ... Honestly
    A woman who fell in love with a snake has reportedly married the reptile at a traditional Hindu wedding celebrated by 2,000 guests in India's Orissa state.
    06.08.2006

    Lookie Here!
    The New Yorker 75th Anniversary Cartoon Collection

    Goofball Facts
     
    Mr. Rogers was an ordained minister.