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George W. Bush |
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"Some one of my visits—one of the reasons I'm visiting here is to ask the question, you know, to people, because if there's moving too slow or people are saying one thing and the other thing is not happening, now's the time to find out."—Bush, talking about hurricane relief Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "George W. Bush Delivers Remarks on Tornado Damage," May 13, 2003
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Random Quote |
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"If you want to say it with flowers, a single rose says: 'I'm cheap.'"
— Delta Burke, Actress
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Snapple Facts |
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#219 An electric eel can release a charge powerful enough to start 50 cars.
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Yo Mama ... |
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so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.
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One Liners |
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Q: Why do women close their eyes during sex?
A: They can't stand seeing a man have a good time.
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 Man Tells Thieves Not To Waste Time | | By: Phantom | Published: 10/30/1999 | | |  |
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BUENOS AIRES (Reuters) -
Weary of his home being burglarized, an Argentine citizen has affixed a notice on his
door politely informing thieves there is nothing left to steal.
"Messrs thieves. Don't waste your time, I have already been robbed three times. There is nothing left. Thanks," Jose
Herner wrote on a cardboard sign at his home in Santa Rosa, 375 miles (600 km) southwest of Buenos Aires.
State-run news agency Telam reported that after reading the notice eight neighbors told him that their
homes had been burglarized in the last week.
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You must register to participate in this discussion.
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Need more guns
(0 replies)
started by
cleighto
(10.30.2000 12:55:06 PM EST)
There was a guy in my city that had been robbed a bunch of times. But he then sat, holed up in his house with a small arsenal, waiting for another burgler. Sure enough, one broke in, and he put a cap in his ass... well, more like a full load or two of buckshot to the head... but that works just as well. He hasn't been broken into since.This is my signature.
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SOUNDS LIKE THEY
(0 replies)
started by
donut38
(10.30.2000 0:28:28 AM EST)
SHOULD CHECK ALL THE HOUSES ON THE BLOCK I BET ONE OF THEM IS RIGHT FULL OF ALL THEIR SHIT
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Woman Kills Husband With Folding Couch
St Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall.
08.09.2008
Brothel Offers Customers Gas Rebate
Clients of the Shady Lady Ranch will get a $50 gas voucher if they fork out $300 -- worth about one hour's worth of services -- at the brothel in Beatty, Nevada, 130 miles northwest of Las Vegas.
08.08.2008
Naked Man Arrested After Hijacking Las Vegas Bus
Maybe he lost his shirt at a casino. Police in Las Vegas say they arrested a naked man who stole a beer and then hijacked a bus several miles northeast of the Strip ...
08.07.2008
Man Dials 911, Complains His Sub Had No Sauce
The sauce for a spicy Italian sandwich was apparently a must have for one Florida man. The man, Reginald Peterson, called 911 twice after a sandwich shop left off the sauce.
08.05.2008
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Goofball Facts |
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Mikckey Mantle was known to peek under hotel-room doors with mirrors.
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