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	George W. Bush
	"There's no doubt in my mind that we should allow the world worst leaders to hold America hostage, to threaten our peace, to threaten our friends and allies with the world's worst weapons." Source: Federal Document Clearing House, "Remarks by the President at Chris Chocola for Congress, and Indiana Victory 2002 Finance Dinner," Sept. 5, 2002

	Random Quote
	"In my house there's this light switch that doesn't do anything. Every sooften I would flick it on and off just to check. Yesterday, I got a callfrom a woman in Germany. She said, "Cut it out."" — Steven Wright, Comedian

	Snapple Facts
	#199 The largest cheesecake ever-made weighed 57,508 lbs.

	Yo Mama ...
	so ugly it looks like she sleeps on a bed of nails face down!

	One Liners
	Q: Why do walruses go to Tupperware parties? A: To find a tight seal.

Most Recent
	Man Charged After Passing Gas Toward Cop A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer ... 09.29.2008 Cuffed, Booked For Not Paying Library Fines A Wisconsin woman has been arrested ... 09.01.2008 Woman Kills Husband With Folding Couch St Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall. 08.09.2008 Brothel Offers Customers Gas Rebate Clients of the Shady Lady Ranch will get a $50 gas voucher if they fork out $300 -- worth about one hour's worth of services -- at the brothel in Beatty, Nevada, 130 miles northwest of Las Vegas. 08.08.2008

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Section Features
	Top Ranked Items

One Year Ago
	Nude Man In High Heels Causes Lockdown McMINNVILLE, Ore. - A man wearing nothing but women's ... 06.25.2007 Mom Teed Off By Urinating Drunk Golfers OAK RIDGE, Tenn. - A mother teed off by drunken golfers ... 06.24.2007 Grandma Finds Condom In McDonald's Bag WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A grandmother was alarmed ... 06.23.2007 Man Arrested For Driving Golf Cart Drunk In the spirit of golf season ... I was actually surprised that this wasn't Roger. 06.04.2007

Two Years Ago
	Prosecutor Charged With Indecency A city prosecutor was charged ... 10.11.2006 Sex Gadget Gets Man in Trouble at Airport Cook County prosecutors say a 29-year-old man traveling with his mother desperately didn't want her to know he'd packed a sexual aid for their trip to Turkey. 09.03.2006 Woman Crashes While Teaching Dog to Drive A woman in Hohhot Beijing, the capital of north China's Inner Mongolia region, crashed her car while giving her dog a driving lesson. 09.02.2006 Teattime Love Bite Was this the only way she was able to get him to make ... 07.27.2006

Lookie Here!
	Our Dumb Century

	Goofball Facts
	If you put a raisin in a glass of champagne, it will keep floating to the top and sinking to the bottom.