"This is Preservation Month. I appreciate preservation. It's what you do when you run for president. You gotta preserve."-Speaking during "PERSEVERENCE Month" at Fairgrounds Elementary School in Nashua, N.H. As quoted in the Los Angeles Times, Jan. 28, 2000
Random Quote
"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools." Ernest Hemingway
Snapple Facts
#106 You way less at the top of a mountain then sea level.
Yo Mama ...
is so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"
One Liners
Q. Did you hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers? A. It's called, Sosumi.
Missing Breast No Cause for Annulment
By: Anonymous
Published: 04/12/2000
An Egyptian court rejected a suit filed by a man who wanted his marriage annulled because he had discovered -- 20 months after their wedding -- that his wife had only one breast, police sources said.
They said the man had accused his wife of deliberately misleading him by not telling him that she had been born without her right breast. He said the condition affected her femininity and could have a negative impact on pregnancy.
A medical examiner told the court, in the southern province of Qena, that the wife was healthy and there was no reason why the couple could not perform their normal marital duties.
Couples in conservative rural Egypt do not customarily take off all their clothes when they have sex.
Avoid socialism at all costs. The government which rules least---rules best.
Keep the Pros out of the Olympics.
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Man Who Threw Feces In CA Courtroom Gets 31 Years A man who sneaked a bag of his feces into a San Diego courtroom during his home-invasion robbery trial, smeared it on his lawyer and threw it at jurors has been sentenced to 31 years in prison.
10.28.2009
Man Charged After Passing Gas Toward Cop A West Virginia man who police said passed gas and fanned it toward a patrolman has been charged with battery on a police officer ...
09.29.2008
Woman Kills Husband With Folding Couch St Petersburg's Channel Five said the man's wife, upset with her husband for being drunk and refusing to get up, kicked a handle after an argument, activating a mechanism that folds the couch up against a wall.
08.09.2008
Two Years Ago
Man Caught Trying To Have Sex With Bicycle They used a master key to unlock the door and they then observed the accused wearing only a white T-shirt, naked from the waist down. The accused was holding the bike and moving his hips back and forth as if to simulate sex."
11.19.2007
Thank You Science Researchers at Granada University in Spain said drinking beer after strenuous physical activity can be beneficial for the body. The scientists said their study found beer can help dehydrated people retain liquid better than water alone ...
11.03.2007
I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
Goofball Facts
A whip doesn't make a cracking sound because it hits something, it does because the tip of the whip is traveling faster than the speed of sound (760 mph).