Man Dies in Bizarre Masturbation Accident
By: BizarreNews	Published: 11/17/2000
GREAT BRITAIN - A 49-year-old British courier masturbated himself to death when a complex procedure he used to heighten his pleasure went terribly wrong. Terrence Simmonds reportedly suffocated to death with two bottles of the sex drug amyl nitrate in a plastic device he used while spanking the monkey. The device consisted of a heavy plastic bag that is connected to a vacuum cleaner. This apparently wasn´t the first time Simmonds tried doing this. He was found unconscious two years earlier after a similar exploit. Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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why????? (0 replies) started by kitana69 (03.24.2001 9:13:24 PM EST) this is just like those kids who died from masturbating with a rope around their neck. They would jump off a stool or chair because it so-called enhanced the feeling of an orgasm. slice it up baby!!

Pathetic (0 replies) started by tazzys (12.19.2000 2:49:05 AM EST) If He Was That fuckin horny, he could have got a slut!! Oh well bright side is that he died happy!!

BANG (0 replies) started by caleran (12.19.2000 2:24:55 AM EST) And it starts over again

stupid fuckin limeys (1 reply) started by rufuswadd (12.01.2000 11:40:28 AM EST) these dental-hygiene challenged subjects of the crown are truly some of the most deviant, freaky sick-fucks and they all deserve to die. ENGLAND GET OUT OF IRELAND!!!!! whatever

they milk cows (0 replies) started by jimf86 (11.30.2000 9:31:42 PM EST) you have to try a new way ..it's a cow milking machine and when you use one tube it gets all the juicefrom you... I'm 69 so try again ole man..

what an IDIOT!!!! (0 replies) started by Lincnpiper01 (11.30.2000 4:45:01 PM EST) How in the hell could a man be so freakin stupid?? Just for that he should have his dick cut off and shoved up his ass sideways.

bull shit (0 replies) started by jollyho (11.18.2000 11:20:23 PM EST) this is virtually impossible

Sphincterally Salutations (0 replies) started by bluefish30 (11.18.2000 5:39:40 AM EST) Where's my pudding...?

hi (2 replies) started by ChelleBelle (11.17.2000 11:40:09 PM EST) eat shit

Dearly beloved..... (0 replies) started by latertater (11.17.2000 10:01:21 PM EST) we are gathered here today to pay our last respects to probably the stupidest fuck on the face of the earth. I bet his family is really embarrassed! How do you explain to somebody how he died? Don't take any wooden nickels!

All kinds (0 replies) started by DRAGULA (11.17.2000 9:51:49 PM EST) It takes all kinds of idiots to makeup a world, now theres one less.

Kaptain Aypes 2 cents (0 replies) started by KaptainAype (11.17.2000 9:50:21 PM EST) Hes British that explains it all. P.S. Maybe he was thinking about the spice girls.... OR MAYBE ELTON JOHN!!! -=KaP'N AyPe=- You Filthy Ape Ass Bitch!!! <^>(0żo)<^> SAY NO TO PIRATES!!!

operation wang chung (0 replies) started by chillywilly1 (11.17.2000 7:01:41 PM EST) if he wanted to heighten his plesure why didn't he just cut his dick off and send it to the moon.

fucking jerkoff (0 replies) started by bikernut (11.17.2000 6:41:54 PM EST) if you want new heights when jerking off try a spot higher , like the roof "EATIN AIN'T CHEATIN"

Idiot! (0 replies) started by fkstick (11.17.2000 5:49:34 PM EST) What a way to be remembered!

WHY????? (0 replies) started by ganjamonkey (11.17.2000 5:17:47 PM EST) WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH THIS DUDE????? iF YER GONNA SPANK IT, JUST STICK TO THE OLD FASHIONED WAY, AND MAYBE SOME VASELINE. LET THIS BE A LESSON, DRUGS ARE BAD(HEHE)AND VACUUM CLEANERS*SUCK*. THAT GUY PROBABLY NEVER GOT LAID, AND THOUGHT HE WAS HAVIN FUN. gET PUSSY, AND NOT HAND-JOBS. PEACE, GANJAMONKEY

I agree.. (0 replies) started by blahblahblah2 (11.17.2000 11:56:06 AM EST) From the way it is written both he and the bottles suffocated? Killed by a hover with a garbage bag.. sad. Blah Blah Blah.. Logging in sucks

I think I'm safe.... (0 replies) started by NakedCanuck (11.17.2000 11:02:48 AM EST) .....from the description above, I can't even figure out how he died? Asphyxiation? The Naked CanuckEverybody is somebody else’s weirdo.

what next lol (0 replies) started by happysmurf13 (11.17.2000 10:48:31 AM EST) amyl nitrate? rotflol what a idiot. like someone said earlier one down 38 billion to go lol

oh well (0 replies) started by montego3 (11.17.2000 9:59:37 AM EST) I guess he came and went at the same time :)

sick (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (11.17.2000 7:57:44 AM EST) how icky!

Don't Waste Our Time! (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (11.17.2000 7:48:45 AM EST) Goddammit! This cock sucking joke blows fag schlong!

potong (0 replies) started by potong (11.17.2000 5:42:50 AM EST) you are a dumass this is cool

Hold it!! (0 replies) started by yusaku999 (11.17.2000 3:21:59 AM EST) This is something I saw in the Darwin Awards. You mean to tell me someone did it again?? You may refer to me as Emperor Jason. http://msnhomepages.talkcity.com/PassportPl/yusaku999/

True Fucking Wanker (0 replies) started by lews9999 (11.17.2000 2:35:15 AM EST) Poof Alert What, i thought it was better

ONE DOWN (0 replies) started by donut38 (11.17.2000 0:39:22 AM EST) 38 BILLION TO GO

Another fucking loser.. (0 replies)   started by Kyote (11.17.2000 0:06:31 AM EST) Just another reason why some people should not have kids.. If you have nothing nice to say, say it often....

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