"Tommy is a good listener, and he's a pretty good actor, too. He can get things done. Action man, we call him." —Bush, referring to Health and Human Services Secretary Tommy ThompsonSource: PR Newswire, "Remarks by the President at the Economic Forum Health Care Security Session," Aug. 13, 2002
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"I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere nearthe place." — Steven Wright, Comedian
Snapple Facts
#202 The mouth of the Statue of Liberty is three feet wide.
Yo Mama ...
so ugly she could scare a hungry wolf off a meat truck.
One Liners
Q: Why is air a lot like sex? A: Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any.
Police Hunt Ronald McDonald Abductors
By: Anonymous
Published: 04/14/2000
Police in ex-Soviet Georgia are hunting for thieves who stole a six-foot-tall Ronald McDonald statue from the country's only McDonald's restaurant, store managers said.
The smiling red-haired mannequin, the fast food giant's worldwide signature mascot, disappeared from his place in front of the store.
Store officials could not explain how Ronald was carted away from his place on a bench intended for clients who wished to be photographed with him.
Ronald is usually chained to the bench after the restaurant closes in the evening and locals speculated that the thieves used metal-cutting equipment to carry out the act.
and locals speculated that the thieves used metal-cutting equipment to carry out the act.
gee, ya think? what the hell else are they gonna use? a pair of 12 sided dice, and their ass?
uncle daddy, i'm getting dizzy!
shut up kid or i'll nail your other foot to the floor!
god, what dumbasses started by
razor696
(04.16.2001 6:21:43 PM EST)
and locals speculated that the thieves used metal-cutting equipment to carry out the act.
gee, ya think? what the hell else are they gonna use? a pair of 12 sided dice, and their ass?
uncle daddy, i'm getting dizzy!
shut up kid or i'll nail your other foot to the floor!
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