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"We acted, and there are no longer mass graves and torture rooms and rape rooms in Iraq." —Bush, remarks at Victory 2004 Reception, Florida, April 23, 2004
 
 

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If Coke Was Like Microsoft

By: UncleJeffPublished: 03/10/1999
 
Save article to file cabinet Send to a Friend Print this out

After the recent Anti-trust hearings, Bill Gates recently compared the software market with the soft drink market. He says Microsoft is struggling to survive but that the beverage giant will be on top forever because the Department of Justice doesn't pick on them. Of course, Bill should be careful not to give Coke any ideas. We might end up with a scenario like the following:

Joe: (walking into McDonalds) Hi, I'd like a Big Mac.

Cashier: Okay, here's your Big Mac and here's your Coke. That'll be $3.99.

Joe: Uh, I don't want a Coke.

Cashier: Sorry, they're bundled.

Joe: What? I'm not paying for a Coke!

Cashier: You don't; the Coke is free.

Joe: But wasn't a Big Mac $2.49 last week?

Cashier: Sure, but this latest Big Mac is far more innovative. It's got integrated Coke!

Joe: I already bought a Snapple across the street... I'm not going to drink the Coke.

Cashier: Then you can't have the burger.

Joe: Okay, fine, I will pay the $3.99 and throw the Coke away.

Cashier: Oh, you can't do that. They're seamlessly integrated. Totally inseparable.

Joe: How can that be? They're two totally separate things?!

Cashier: No, watch. (takes Big Mac, dunks it in a tank of Coke) See?

Joe: Why did you just do that?!

Cashier: It's a benefit to the consumer. Otherwise you'd end up with two different, inconsistent tastes. This way you're assured of a continuous taste across all your foods.

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    This Section

    ARTICLE FORUM THREAD  
    Title: up the ante
    By: timhuck
    Date: 03.10.2001 1:59 AM EST

    I'll give you $3.99 if you dont tell me anymore bazooka joe humor.

    [ All Posts ] [ Reply ] [ Where You Are ] [ New Thread ]

    Current Thread and Replies
    up the ante  
    started by timhuck
    (03.10.2001 1:59:19 AM EST)

    I'll give you $3.99 if you dont tell me anymore bazooka joe humor.

    Thanks for your comment.
    by cheeseball
    (03.10.2001 3:57:37 AM EST)


    I was falling into a numb, coma-like trance until I read your comment. Thanks for the laugh!

    Don't sweat the petty stuff, but always pet the sweaty stuff.


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