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Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
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George W. Bush |
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GOV. BUSH: "Because the picture on the newspaper. It just seems so un-American to me, the picture of the guy storming the house with a scared little boy there. I talked to my little brother, Jeb...I haven't told this to many people. But he's the governor of...I shouldn't call him my little brother...my brother, Jeb, the great governor of Texas." JIM LEHRER: "Florida." GOV. BUSH: "Florida. The state of the Florida."-The NewsHour With Jim Lehrer, April 27, 2000
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Random Quote |
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"May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world." The Quayles' 1989 Christmas card.
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Snapple Facts |
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#93 A Kangaroo can jump 30 feet.
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Yo Mama ... |
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is so stupid when asked on an application,"Sex?",she marked, "M, F and is sometimes Wednesday too."
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One Liners |
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Q: Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? A: Mace will do that to you.
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 Peter, Peter Pumpkin Boinker | | By: Robnoxious | Published: 10/31/1999 | | |  |
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Police arrested Malcolm Davidson, a 27 year old white male, resident of Wimbledon, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 pm Friday. Davidson
will be charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication at the County courthouse on Monday.
The suspect allegedly stated that as he was passing a pumpkin patch, he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview from the County courthouse jail. Davidson went on to state that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin
that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need". "I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.
In the process, Davidson apparently failed to notice the Wimbledon Municipal police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him. "It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor. "I walked up to (Davidson) and he's...just working away at this
pumpkin." Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Davidson.
"I just went up and said, "Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you are screwing a pumpkin?" He got real surprised as you'd expect and then looked me straight in the face and said, 'A pumpkin? Damn... is it midnight already?"
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More Stupid News...
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| Title: |
Haha |
| By: |
Robnoxious
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| Date: |
10.31.2000 12:10 AM EST |
First. Buttheads :-)
If a sheep is a ram and a mule is an ass, how come a ram in the ass is a goose?
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Casino Joke |
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I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
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Goofball Facts |
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George Washington's face was scarred from a bout with smallpox.
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