Howdy Goofballers,
Thanks for clicking on the first State of the Goofball address. I am going to try to address the Goofball community via this Rants area, to keep you informed of Goofball.com's progress and point out new features and submissions that we feel are worthy of mention. And while my name is up top, you can be sure I'll be collaborating with JSkills, TheAdvisor, Phantom and VirtualJul.
Speaking of, I would like to officially welcome VirtualJul to the 'Goofball Staff'. This place has been a mess and after speaking with some of the other goofball chicks, we felt this place could use a woman’s touch. Welcome VirtualJul, now go get me another beer...
1) We Have Some Winners!
Congratulations to darrellmccloskey and brett112169, the July and August grand prize winners in our "Tell A Friend" contest. Both had a choice of three prizes -- a Diamond RIO 500 portable MP3 player, a SONY DVD player or a Samsung 27" television -- darrellmccloskey picked the DVD player while brett112169 picked the TV. We hope you're enjoying your prizes and thanks again for referring your friends to Goofball.com.
As for the rest of you "Tell A Friend" losers, it's not over! We are now well into the second month of the contest and you can still earn more entries. You’ve already got one when you yourself registered, but you’ll have an added entry into the drawing for each person you refer who becomes a registered goofballer. For more details check out 'Tell-A-Friend' contest, which runs through October.
In addition to the grand prize, we’re giving away 5 runners-up Goofball.com t-shirts. Congrats to the winners of the last drawing.
2.) Registration Update
We now have more than 130,000 registered Goofballers! Remember registration is not required to view most of Goofball.com, but it is necessary if you want to access the 'Uncensored' area and if you want to leave comments with your unique username and signature file. If you haven’t registered yet… what are you waiting for?!? Click here NOW!
3.) More Ways to Win!
Back by popular demand...Goofball Slots! In addition to fan favorite Female Inmate Slots, we've got new and improved slots including Celebrity Mugshots, Mardi Gras, Titties, Asses, Fans and for the ladies ... Naked Guys. High scores will be logged and winners will receive monthly prizes (right now, it's t-shirts, but prizes are subject to change when we feel like it.)
If you're more the intellectual type, you can win on your wit alone. Chime in on September's Caption Contest. The three best captions will receive the styish Goofball.com t-shirt
Another contest in development will be based on content submitted that makes it onto Goofball.com. You’ll earn an entry for each item you submit that is published. So, for all you regulars that post your jokes on the Message Boards, here’s your chance to earn credit towards a Goofball.com prize. More on this to come in my next post. Start submitting now!
4.) What's With Those Friggin’ Ads!?!
Goofball.com has been around since December 1998 and started out as a site where I could get by on a single server for $24.95/month, a little PERL and CGI programming and mostly flat pages. But to thanks the Goofball Staff and all of you faithful goofballers, our current set up has exploded to a database-driven system that runs on eight machines and costs A LOT more than $25 each month. In order to sustain Goofball.com and keep it a free site for you, we have advertisers -- deal with it. And hey, click through and check out those advertisers... you never know you may find something that interests you (we have a penial implant ad running, and hey it might help).
5.) Staff Top Picks
Since we’ve been around since 1998, there’s definitely some older content you may have missed. Check out these personal favorites of the Goofball staff.
Robnoxious
Grumpy *(uncensored)
Casey Kasem Ripping His Staff
Peter, Peter Pumpkin Boinker
Whose Your Daddy! *(uncensored)
Wheelchair Rebecca *(uncensored)
JSkills
The Shit List
An Honest Bum
Bite My Eye
Rough Kick
Salam Hayek *(uncensored)
The Stranger *(uncensored)
TheAdvisor
The 19th Hole
Bobby Knight Tirade
Smart Beep
Poontos *(uncensored)
VirtualJul
Dutch Commercial On Learning English
*(uncensored)
Busted On Radio
Another Unhappy Computer User
The Perfect Shot
Sexual Blooper *(uncensored)
5.) Etc...
If you have a topic that you would like to see addressed in this space, please send me an email. If it is not addressed in this column you should see a response in your mailbox.
Would you like to see this information more frequently and in an email newsletter format? Let me know that via email also.
Robnoxious
I don't make the news, I only report it!
