The Villiage Idiot Towed My Car
By: mysteryman	Published: 01/22/2001
I'm no George Carlin, but I can bitch and moan just as good as the next guy. A few weeks ago my car was towed away to the town highway department. I knew this not just because of the disappearing act of an Oldsmobile, but because of the phone message that started my ordeal. Apparantly, it is illegal to have a "for sale" sign on any vehicle parked within town limits. Is my home town governed by retards? So anyway, here is how my Monday from hell began... I go to the address of the office that was left on my machine only to be told that I am in the wrong building. So off I go to "the next driveway" with a closed gate and no other way in. Now I had to find parking two blocks away because every corner has a "no parking" sign (violators will be towed). After I found the office I was told to go to, I was again pointed in another direction two buildings down. When I retrieved my car and pulled in, I noticed that every parking space was reserved and was once again at risk of being towed - what fun! So back around the corner I went - again - and into the right office, finally. Did I mention that I'm late for work and it is 23 degrees out? Now I recieved my $65 fine and a $100 summons which I am pleading "not guilty" to - because a town official who is trained in the laws of the town did not print his name on the ticket (too lazy so he scribbled a letter "B") as well as putting down the color of my car as "black" when it is clearly blue (and the ticket was written at 2:00 pm). Obviously the villiage idiot landed a job at the highway department and his first assignment was towing my car! The kicker is that the fine is the highest there is of all parking violations. Two lousy words visible on my car cost more than blocking a fire zone or hydrant! What harm am I doing by getting free advertisement? If I put up a garage sale sign on a telephone pole, do they pull the pole out of the ground?! Do town officials have nothing better to do than write ridiculous laws to piss off good citizens? Now when I go to court (and miss three hours of work-$60)the judge probably won't be sympathetic because the fine was his idea!In the end I lose $265 and gain nothing more than a headache! I think I'll follow the judge home and paint his curb yellow! Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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You've been here before... (0 replies) started by shaftman (05.18.2001 4:56:53 AM EST) No shit sherlock! Stop letting these old fuckers get into places to create these self serving laws (which are unconstitutional, see amendment #1, freedom of speech). It's time we stop bending over backwards for the good of the few at the expense of the many. Trust me, I know what this is all about because I work for an asshole town like yours. (but not for long). BTW, good rant.

USA... (0 replies) started by sal1981 (05.03.2001 7:51:03 AM EST) ...the place were you apperently get screwed by the goverment powers! Playing FPS, RTS, RPG or just PBG. It just ainīt the same as playing Monopoly

don't paint, sign (0 replies) started by beckdaddy (02.04.2001 3:34:20 AM EST) why not put a "For Sale" sign on the cop's car and judge's car. lot less mess. Beckdaddy out.

Must have been (1 reply) started by DARKOVERLORD (02.02.2001 12:59:16 PM EST) using the democrats way of thinking. He was just trying to save you from your self. TRESPASSER'S WILL BE SHOT!! SURVIVOR'S WILL BE SHOT AGAIN!!!

Huh? (2 replies) started by chukmac (02.02.2001 1:51:41 AM EST) Excellent rant, I'm glad to hear you won. Too bad you can't turn around and charge them a fine for being idiots. The replies were pretty fair too, but WHOA!....I think the overloard needs a little Prozac or something. At least have a few beers and turn on the Playboy channel; you are waaaay too wound up. How about congratulating a guy on victory instead of looking for conspiracy in wrongful parking ticket rant? My dream....a Democrat versus Republican "deathmatch". After extinguishing their opponents, the winners get to do the country another favor by putting a bullet in their own heads!

good rant (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (01.25.2001 8:47:26 AM EST) sorry to hear about your car and court..that all sucks but i must say thqt this is one of the best rants i have read on this website in quite a while! write some more..you are good at it.. :)

SEEMS TO ME.... (0 replies) started by Gunner96 (01.24.2001 6:19:50 PM EST) the officer and judge may be related. Do they by chance have the same last name. They sound like a couple of real "cuttin' edge" Harvard law professionals. Maybe they are related...and their Mom and Dad are also their Aunt and Uncle! So that makes them brothers and cousins!! Wouldn't that be a kick in the balls. Hey mysteryman...just for shits and grins...you should put a for sale sign on the police cruiser and one on the courthouse. They'll be scratchin' their asses on that one. Whatever's customary...count me out.

Thank the dems (0 replies) started by DARKOVERLORD (01.24.2001 8:21:33 AM EST) Clinton can rape,sell guidence systems to china.Give 4 BILLION dollars to russia while the SSI system fails but you will pay a few hundered dollars for bad parking. Seems fare to me TRESPASSER'S WILL BE SHOT!! SURVIVOR'S WILL BE SHOT AGAIN!!!

You're Forgetting (0 replies) started by JethroSkywalker (01.22.2001 7:07:03 PM EST) You're forgetting that you should NEVER TRUST YOUR GOVERNMENT. The only good things the government does for people is build roads out in the middle of nowhere and replace them every 2 1/2 years because of overweight 18-wheelers. "Honey, I didn't mean it like that!"

I beat them!!!!!!!!! (0 replies) started by mysteryman (01.22.2001 6:50:37 PM EST) Well I went to court and the officer was a "lookalike" for rockys fat,bum brother lou,and needless to say didnt keep acurate information on the occurance.Fortunately for me he did not remember any number on the sign or the fact that it was on the glass, so I told the judge it was a blank sign i bought for my friend- no law against that!The judge said it doesnt make sense that there wasnt a number,hence the car was not for sale and I WON!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!Me-1 mysteryman-2000

REVENGE (0 replies) started by blazed3wayz (01.22.2001 5:09:29 PM EST) revenge on their family and his famliys, famliys it not what you can do for your country, it's how your country can fuck you over.

Don't get mad... (0 replies) started by OliverClozoff (01.22.2001 12:52:09 PM EST) ...get even. President, American Association of Amateur Gynecologists

Damn (0 replies) started by thelizard (01.22.2001 9:57:50 AM EST) That's fucked up!!!! Poison Clan rocks the world !!!!

Dude That Suks (0 replies) started by barnyardstyle (01.22.2001 0:22:02 AM EST) I won't even go in to the problems I've had involving my car and the government. By definition and design any government-run department is incompetent, inefficient, and has absolutely no movitation to improve itself. They need to quit writing new laws. There are far too many right now. Many of the laws on the books right now are ignored or enforced in a completely arbitrary manner, so what good does that do anybody?

FIGHT THE POWERS THAT BE (0 replies)   started by donut38 (01.21.2001 11:33:35 PM EST) NO MATTER WHO THEY ARE

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