The Way It Was
By: RedNeckedTulsan	Published: 10/24/2000
I came across this chapter in a 1950's home economics class textbook designed for use by 10th grade girls. At first it shocked me, then made me howl with laughter. "THE GOOD WIFE GUIDE" Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready on time for his return from work. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favorite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. Gather up school books, toys, papers etc... and then run a dust cloth over the tables. During the colder months, you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift, too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first, remember his topics of conversation are more important than yours. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax. Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. Don't greet him with complaints and problems. Don't complain if he's late home for dinner, or even stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange the pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. Once he has had a chance to have his evening meal, clear the dishes and wash up promptly. If your husband should offer to help decline his offer as he may feel obliged to repeat this offer and after a long working day he does not need the extra work. Encourage your husband to pursue his hobbies and interests and be supportive without seeming to encroach. If you have any little hobbies yourself try not to bore him speaking of these, as women's interests are often rather trivial compared to men's. At the end of the evening, tidy the home ready for the morning and again think ahead to his breakfast needs. Your husband's breakfast is vital if he is to face the outside world in a positive fashion. Once you have both retired to the bedroom prepare yourself for bed as promptly as possible. Whilst feminine hygiene is of the utmost importance, your tired husband does not want to queue for the bathroom as he would have to do for his train. But remember to look your best when going to bed. Try to achieve a look that is welcoming without being obvious. If you need to apply face-cream or hair-rollers, wait until he is asleep as this can be shocking to a man last thing at night. It is likely that your husband will then fall promptly asleep so adjust your clothing, freshen up and apply your nighttime face and hair care products. You may then set the alarm so that you can arise shortly before him in the morning. This will enable you to have his morning cup of tea ready when he awakes. Have things gotten better or worse since then? I'm no judge, but I am off to find me a 50's gal that went to a school that utilized this textbook. Why not join the rest of us on the inside and get all of Goofball.com?
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50's girl (0 replies) started by dca7 (12.17.2000 8:35:14 AM EST) not a damn thing wrong with that.if women don't like it they should get a job and shut up

50's girl (0 replies) started by dca7 (12.17.2000 8:29:52 AM EST) not a damn thing wrong with that.if women don't like it they should get a job and shut up

POPUPS (0 replies) started by kylelambert (12.03.2000 9:00:48 PM EST) Popups are for porn sites. I guess GOOFBALL is on that level now.

OH MY GOD!!! (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (11.30.2000 4:21:30 PM EST) They did NOT just say that!!!!!!!! That is the most ridiculous, idiotic, repulsive, imbicilic, dumb-assed, single brain-celled, barbaric, cave-man thing that I have ever heard (aside from Al Gore's speeches)! And women DID this????????? Hats off to all the bra burners who broke the chains for the rest of us! =o)

gone are the salad days... (0 replies) started by twistedcomix (11.26.2000 7:13:24 PM EST) I think that the world went to hell when women got to vote. I mean, look at this last election. Gore got thousands upon thousands of women's votes just by appealing to their emotions. Women should stay home and take care of their families. I want my woman to do that. Also, I would like to stop paying taxes and have a solid gold toilet. However, I think there is a snowballs chance in hell of anything I've mentioned coming true. "Disarming the public is the surest path to enslaving them."

Here's my response to the 50's Home Ec Book: (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (11.21.2000 10:31:29 AM EST) The following is from an actual New Millenium Home Economics textbook intended for High School dropouts, learning them how to prepare for life? 1. HAVE DINNER READY: Call that bum who lives with you & tell him to pick up a pizza on his way home from work if he feels like eating something besides cheez-wiz on crackers tonight. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned that he eats a hot meal. Most men really like pizza and the prospect of hot cheese with pepperoni is part of the warm welcome needed after playing golf with the boss. 2.PREPARE YOURSELF: Put the cigarette out before you get home from work and give a quick spray of binanca. Check in the rear-view mirror in the car to make sure you don't have any spinach stuck in your teeth from your late lunch. You have just been with a lot of work-weary people. Turn on the TV when you get home. Your boring day may need a lift. 3.CLEAR AWAY CLUTTER: If you get home before him, make yourself a stiff drink and chill on the sofa. If he complains about the mess, quickly clear it away by kicking his lazy a** out of the house. You will feel you have reached a haven of rest and order, especially if he takes the kids with him. 4.PREPARE THE CHILDREN. Do a quick diaper sniff test to see if there are any poopy diapers. If a diaper change is in order - hand the kid to your man when he walks in the door. He hasn't seen his children all day - he should experience the joys of his little treasures. 5.MINIMIZE THE NOISE: When you arrive home after working all day, turn the car stereo down before you shut off the engine. There's nothing worse than an abruptly cut-off song - especially if it's a jammin' tune. Greet your man with a "oh, are you still here", letting him know you at least notice his presence. 6.Some Don'ts: Don't listen to his problems or complaints - you have enough of your own. If he complains that you're late for dinner, don't give him the finger until the kids are in the other room. Count this as minor compared with what you might have gone through that day. 7.MAKE YOURSELF COMFORTABLE. Lean back in a comfortable chair or lay down in the bedroom. Have him get you a cool or warm drink. Take off your high-heels and wiggle your toes. Tell him to shut up so you can relax and unwind. 8. DON'T LISTEN TO HIM: You have heard more crap today from your boss & co-workers than one person deserves, so tune him out right away, before you totally lose your mind. 9.MAKE THE EVENING YOURS: Get him to take the kids & go out to dinner or to other places of entertainment; so you can relax for a change. He will never understand your world of strain and pressure - you need to be home and relax. 10.THE GOAL: forget about making your home a place of peace and order - hire a maid who went to high school in the 1950s instead.

Oh Hell Yeah (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (11.08.2000 10:16:15 AM EST) I say let's bring back the good old day. Back when Men were Men, and Women were Quite!!!

is this real? (0 replies) started by jasntab (11.06.2000 0:47:03 AM EST) I guess Gloria Stienam thought she had burned all of those text books!

Hmmmm..... (0 replies) started by sweetiepeach (11.03.2000 1:37:03 PM EST) ...I don't think I'd have a problem with this, if my husband was good to me...and as long as he pees "IN" the toilet and puts the lid down when he's done...LOL! ~SweetiePeach~

what's the problem? (1 reply) started by SUPERCHICKEN69 (10.29.2000 0:42:47 AM EST) i see nothing wrong with this. if i'm staying home all day, i want my husband to feel that warm, cuddly feeling of walking into a home prepared for his comfort. i teach my daughter this. she brings his paper, i bring his supper. we're all very happy. we need to go back to this kind of life.

Bitch (0 replies) started by hardball (10.28.2000 2:51:51 PM EST) That dumb bitch Gloria S. fucked up everthing. Plus wheres the chapter on giving head ? Gun's Gun's we need more Gun's, what for, to preserve freedom.Don't ask what you country can do for you. Get off your lazy fat ass and get a fucking job.

What the hell?? (0 replies) started by Megatron (10.28.2000 0:44:26 AM EST) This has gotta be a joke. If I was a chick back then, damn, all hell would be breaking loose. hehe

In Lieu of recent events... (0 replies) started by iluvpie (10.27.2000 1:28:45 PM EST) I think that you have to be careful with this one, some women's rights activist group might have a problem with it. They may say something like 'painful reminder of what tragic lifestyles women had to endure' or 'poking fun at the serious issue of feminine equality' . Then agian, you always have to worry about PETA, 'cause they have a problem with anything that they themselves didn't set out to destroy. -Fuck authority, Fuck rules, Fuck laws, Fuck morality, and Fuck everyone. The thing about pussy is that it always wants you to commit to it, but never wants you to actually have it.

The way it was ? (0 replies) started by madclicker (10.26.2000 4:36:43 PM EST) I think this is too funny. Unrealistic though. I grew up in the 60 & my brothers and sisters were all 50's kids. We all concur.. no way our mom put up with that. Expecially the don't get mad if he stays out all night. If my dad was home later than 12:00 , it was a war zone ! ha, ha, I must admit .. I havn't laughed that hard in a while. Thanks Goofball

THIEVES!!!! (1 reply) started by sbyerly13 (10.25.2000 4:48:21 PM EST) This story was taken from Uncle John's Ultimate Bathroom Reader. RedNeckedTulsan will burn in the fiery pits of hell with Satan's wrath for eternity for this along with all the women who are not exactly like the article describes. Smitty

Man, (0 replies) started by BriRedfern (10.25.2000 12:23:04 PM EST) It really makes youu realize how much the sixties changed everything. Was this an American book or no? I'm thinking it probably wasn't (Queue is very British these days, but it may have been used here more back in the day) but I can't really tell. I don't know if anyone is better of these days, except that women can still do this if they want, but back then this was ALL they were allowed to do.

UTOPIA (1 reply) started by methos316 (10.25.2000 11:59:24 AM EST) Nice to see that at one time women were encouraged to do what they should be doing today and serving man. Also it proves what ive been saying for years that things were better when they were simpler and women knew their role and did what they were told......just look at todays f***ed up society in comparison. Shit happens. Get over it.

Urban Legend (3 replies) started by bobbydread (10.25.2000 7:55:06 AM EST) Check this out at www.snopes.com No one has been able to find what book that comes from. It is like the "19th Centruy 8th grade test", an urban legend.

What's has changed? (0 replies) started by oliverclozoff (10.25.2000 0:32:37 AM EST) Most men still make enough money to support their families on one income if they didn't have to pay so much in taxes. For the most part, women work just to pay the taxes on their husbands' income. There are just too damned many people in this world who will not be content with running their own miserable lives!

ahhh... (0 replies) started by rook30505 (10.24.2000 11:31:13 PM EST) the good old days.If only we could have that now.Without the depressions and world wars of course. "You da best he-bitch in my man-stable.If I had 2 more manginas like you,I'd be a millionare"

the beaver (0 replies) started by Anonymous Goofball (10.24.2000 10:52:39 PM EST) It may sound cute and corny, but you have to ask yourself if society is in better shape now than it was then. I shudder at the answer.

At first... (0 replies) started by oliveoyl0902 (10.24.2000 9:07:18 PM EST) ..this pissed me off. Then I got to thinking about it. The world was a better place back then. Mothers stayed home and raised their kids, fathers made enough money to feed and shelter everyone, and society wasn't as screwy as it is now. Kids grew up with vast amounts of respect for their elders, and each other, and they didn't kill each other in school. Is it better or worse now? In every change, there's good and bad. Women aren't looked at as obedient servents anymore, but on the other hand, we're not as cherished and protected, for the most part. I know if I didn't have to bust my ass working and trying to make it through school, I'd have a hell of a lot more time to sit back and enjoy spoiling the shit out of my man. God is coming, and boy is she pissed!

My wife too (0 replies) started by obiwan (10.24.2000 6:21:29 PM EST) But sooner or later I wake up! E-chuta!

What's so funny? (3 replies)   started by JSkills (10.24.2000 4:20:58 PM EST) My wife is like that. JSkills Goofball Staff

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