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Nose Picking Glossary
Submitted By: OneEyedDick
Article Date: 06/19/2001
URL: http://www.goofball.com/jokes/tasteless/INC20010108190751

The Kiddie Pick: When you're by yourself and you uninhibitedly twist your forefinger into your nostril with childlike joy and freedom. And the best part is, there's no time limit!

Camouflaged Kiddie Pick: When, in the presence of other people, you wrap your forefinger in a tissue, then thrust it in deep and hold back the smile.

Fake Nose Scratch: When you make believe you've got an itch but you're really trolling the nostril edge for stray boogers.

Making A Meal Out Of It: You do it so furiously, and for so long, you're probably entitled to dessert.

Surprise Pickings: When a sneeze or laugh causes snot to come hurtling out of your nose, and you have to gracefully clean it off your shirt.

Autopick: The kind you do in a car, when no one's looking. NOTE: Someone is probably looking.

Pick Your Brains: Done in private, this is the one where your finger goes in so far, it passes the septum.

Pick And Save: When you have to pick it quickly, just when someone looks away, and then you pocket the snot so they don't catch on to what you did.

Pick And Roll: No explanation needed.

Pick And Flick: Ditto.

Pick And Stick: You wanted it to be a "Pick and Flick," but it stubbornly clings to your fingertip.

Paydirt: The kind where you remove a piece of snot so big, it improves your breathing by 90%.