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Assorted Goofiness
College Humor
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George W. Bush
 
"There's only one person who hugs the mothers and the widows, the wives and the kids upon the death of their loved one. Others hug but having committed the troops, I've got an additional responsibility to hug and that's me and I know what it's like." - Washington, D.C., Dec. 11, 2002
 
 

Random Quote
 
"Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty."
— sign in a Budapest zoo
 
 

Snapple Facts
 
#62 The lifespan of a tastebud is 10 days.
 
 

Yo Mama ...
 
is so fat even Bill Gates couldn't pay for her liposuction!
 
 

One Liners
 
Q. What's the hardest part of rollerblading?
A. Telling your dad you're gay.
 
 



34,514 articles November 20, 2009 558,334 postings




Top 20 of All Time As Rated By Our Viewers

My New Radio
I am so happy with my new Dolby surround sound system ...
03.27.2004

4.20
Sex All Afternoon - But No Head
Two men camping in the mountains had spent four days ...
05.20.2006

4.19
Little Billy On Getting Older
Little Billy was sitting on a park bench munching ...
03.24.2005

4.15
Are My Testicles Black?
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital with ...
02.18.2005

4.10
Women Are Evil By Nature
A woman went up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestured alluringly to the bartender who approached her immediately. She seductively signaled that he should bring his face closer to hers ...
12.14.2006

4.09
Little Old Ladies
Two old ladies are outside their nursing home, having ...
06.17.2006

4.08
Bedroom Football
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when ...
04.21.2004

4.00
Mental Case
Jim and Edna were both patients in a mental hospital. ...
12.12.2004

4.00
Mexican Oysters
A big Texan stopped at a local restaurant following ...
09.28.2009

4.00
Dear John
A Marine recently received a 'Dear John' letter...
08.01.2003

3.94
Patient's Rights
Doctor Dave slept with one of his patients and felt guilty...
07.26.2001

3.88
Dragging Their Feet
Two men are approaching each other on a sidewalk. ...
01.30.2004

3.86
Cool Person Test
Check to see if you are cool.
11.25.2002

3.86
Poor Pirate
A man meets a pirate in a bar. The pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch...
06.18.2001

3.83
Mental Hospital Phone Menu
Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. ...
09.03.2008

3.83
Hate Your Job?
When you have a 'I Hate My Job' day, [even if retired ...
01.08.2008

3.83
New Dog Breeds
Collie + Lhasa Apso = Collapso, a dog that...
11.22.2002

3.75
The Speeding Ticket
A driver is pulled over by a policeman...
01.06.2003

3.75
Unique Breakfast
A man observed a sign in the window of a restaurant ...
04.24.2004

3.75
You're My Prision Bitch
An escaped convict, imprisoned for 1st degree murder...
08.25.2001

3.73

Top Goofs
 

1 Huge Ship Entering The Harbour 4.52
2 Pooty Paws 4.44
3 Mad Wife 4.41
4 Okla Homa 4.41
5 The Free Hugs Campaign Has Improved 4.40
6 My New Maid 4.39
7 Bareback Thong 4.29
8 From One Good Drunk To Another 4.29
9 Do You Have A Good Plan For Tonight? 4.27
10 Hall Of Fame: Best Husbands 4.23

 

Casino Joke
 
I know this crazy guy who just won't play at a casino. He just pretends to play in his head. Last week he lost his mind!
 
 

Classic Goofs
 

1 Tits T-Shirt 4.92
2 A Kodak Moment 4.85
3 Staring At The Ceiling 4.83
4 Poolside Beauty 4.82
5 Body Paint Lingerie 4.76
6 Depth Perseption Test 4.75
7 South Beach 4.70
8 Me and My Sitter 4.66
9 Inspirational 4.63
10 We All Need A Good Cause To Support 4.62

 
 

Poll Results
 
President Obama?
Very excited, still dancing in the streets
Best of two choices
He's keeping Bush's Sec. of Defense - nuff said
He's a crook and a liar, like the rest
McCain should have won
I'm voting for Palin in 2012
1,384 Responses
 
Submit A Question

 

Goofball Facts
 
Iron weighs more after it rusts.
 
 

Features
 

2009 Deadpool
Don't miss out ... If you are a Goofballer, it's free. If you are not ... become a Goofballer!
01.22.2009